


Three's A Crowd

by foreverinprinxietyhell



Category: Impractical Jokers
Genre: Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Cum drinking, Down in the Dump, Eating out, Edible Lube, M/M, Making Out, Oral Sex, PWP, Past Relationship(s), Scented Lube, Threesome - M/M/M, handjob, lip biting, s2ep16, tag teaming
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-21
Updated: 2017-08-21
Packaged: 2018-12-13 13:33:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,183
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11760951
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/foreverinprinxietyhell/pseuds/foreverinprinxietyhell





	Three's A Crowd

Team challenges were always refreshing after having doing most individually; he loved all three men equally, but the youngest member tried to hide a sense of disappointment when he was sent out onto the floor with Joe since there were deeper feelings held for the other pair that stood behind the scenes. Taking a deep breath, the two stood in front of a projector screen as people filed in and sat down accordingly, the slideshow starting after introductions.

Unable to control the urge to laugh, it was a wonder how Sal got through as far as he did when the outburst finally calmed after a plain white page popped up titled ‘Perfect for Lovers’; not thinking anything of it despite how the four always attempted to thwart the others from winning, his guard was let down. Turning to face the screen, facial expressions changed completely as annoyance flared at an image of the oldest friend kissing his sister Jenna in front of a beachy background, pinching the bridge of a nose delicately. 

“C’mon bud, it can’t be that bad.”

“That’s easy for you to say!”

“I doubt it’s gonna get worse.”

“Joe, do you even know us? All those years spent together for naught…” Brian scolded playfully through their earpieces, mischief in the gruff tone when he began to laugh lightly when the slide transformed to the next; the two standing together before a linoleum bathtub, a towel wrapped modestly around the woman’s naked body while the other stood proudly with his thick cock dangling out in the open. 

Covering a widened mouth with both hands, the man tried to control a reasonable reaction as he turned on a heel to face their guests. Nervously, he waited with anticipation as the next title was read as ‘Accepting of All Lifestyles’, a sensitive stomach knotting in dread as a sharp breath was inhaled by the other man.

“What is it now?” 

“Nothing, that’s it…”

“Oh no it isn’t, you turn around and look!” Murray piped up in a squeaky voice filled with excitement.

“Don’t.” 

“Turn around!” 

Hesitantly, Salvatore faced the projector after a moment of denial with hips held in both hands to be met with a picture of Jenna curled against the man she had pretended to marry for a punishment, his beady little eyes gleaming proudly as Q laid on the other side, “Motherfuckers!”

“By show of hands, anybody interest in hearing more about the property?” the older man asked, looking around to see that no one raised a hand.

“Well, if you’ll excuse me, I’m ‘bout to kill those two.”

“Need backup?”

“Did they mess with your flesh and blood?!” he unintentionally snapped at the other, guilt a dull blade compared to the mixture of anger and jealousy. Marching to the room where they were stationed, the door was slammed shut before being locked into place, the older man used as a human shield, “What in the hell?”

“Sally, we didn’t…”

“You better not have, or so help me.”

“What’s the big deal? Murr married her, so they went on a honeymoon right before it was annulled.” Brian explained, shrugging half-heartedly in place of words.

“Do you know what it feels like to be teased like that?”

“I could if I had any siblings.”

“That’s not what I mean,” Sal sighed in exasperation, leaning forward to offer a timid kiss that was accepted only seconds later once it was realized what was happening, strong arms wrapping around a pudgy middle, parting only when lungs begged for oxygen, “That’s what I couldn’t stand, me not being wrapped around you.”

“Well, here we are. Sure you don’t just want me for the body?”

“That’d be a bonus, if you’ll let me have it.”

“I hate to interrupt, but I don’t wanna listen to this.” Murr mused from where he still stood behind the other for protection.

“Too bad ‘cos this involves you too, ferret.”

“Stop calling me that! And whatdya mean?”

“I wanna be sandwiched between the both of you…” he stated simply in a husky voice as he slipped from one grasp and fell right into the other, teeth nipping at a bottom lip, “That is, if you’re up for it.”

“Oh, you bet your sweet ass I am.” 

“Well then, shall we move to a vacant room?”

“Baby, we’re happy to oblige, but we’re in public.”

“Go ahead and leave for the day, I’ll help the crew pack up for the day,” the fourth member spoke on the other side of the door, let in only when the three gathered charged cell phones and car keys, “It’s about time the three of ya shacked up.” 

“Should we find it weird that you’ve been waiting for this day?” 

“Can’t a guy just be happy for his buds? Get out of here before I change my mind.”  

Rendezvousing at the closest location, which was James’ apartment, the men gathered inside once the front door was unlocked, the youngest member already pinned against a nearby wall as two sets of mouths battled for dominance; inevitably the host won with a satisfied grunt as their lips sealed into place, pressing as close as physically possible as Q began to rub at tented jeans. 

“Save some of ‘im for me, would ya?” 

“There’s enough of me to share, promise,” Sal mused, giggling when the older man leaned in to kiss the other one before him, “That goes for both of us, huh?”

“Sure does. Now, how are we gonna do this?”

“Haven’t you ever heard of foreplay?”

“We’ve been waiting too long.”

“Fair enough. Should we take turns?” Murr asked, neck twitching infamously to the left as he began to cringe at those words, “Probably should’ve sugarcoated that a little…” 

“I was thinking we could treat Sally together, if ya catch my drift.”

“I call dibs on the front!”

Intrigued by their plan the younger man did not question it since there was an abnormally large amount of trust built, giving consent as he was led to a king sized mattress with a disheveled bedspread laying halfway in the floor. A blush colored the clean shaven cheeks as an apology was ushered since company had not been expected even though his house was usually spotless; eyebrows cocked at a lousy excuse, it was blatant that the homeowner had woken up from a wet dream.

“Have you reloaded from this morning, or do we need to wait?”

“Uh, yes, it’s been a few hours.” 

“Makin’ sure, babe. If I can’t resist that slender cock of yours then you sure as hell have no chance either.” Brian chuckled, gently palming a covered cheek from behind as he planted a loving smooch against an unprotected earlobe, the two nearly forgetting about their addition when sapphire and hazel eyes locked for an extended moment.

“Wait… Are you guys a couple?”

“Sorta. We’ve been on and off again for a few months, we figured having someone else join may spice things up between us.”

“Oh, I-I don’t want to intrude…”

“Nonsense!” Murr exclaimed, waving the guy over with a curled hand that was immediately accepted as his lips met with a stubbled chin, “We love you too, which is why we’d only want you.”

Unsure of his place momentarily, Salvatore was pulled onto the duvet by well-muscled arms kept in shape despite the other one retiring from a long-term job as a firefighter, melting into the embrace. Lost in an earthy musk, he burrowed into the body for added security before courage came back enough to bring their mouths back together as passion deepened, “Where’s our little ferret?”

“Probably scavenging for scraps.”

“At a time like this?”

“One thing about the guy, he’s got a massive lube collection. Might be trying to decide which one’d be best.” 

“Exactly what I’m doing,” Murray called from down the hall, returning with a few different bottles held against his chest, “Figured I’d let you choose from my favorites, Sal. They’re all scented and edible.”

Picking up each container to weigh between three options, the man in question shad a hard time choosing between caramel and lemon when the former was handed over, “Q’s the one who’s eating me out, I presume?” 

“To prep you up, yes.” 

“Then why would you want to have a citrus taste?”

“You’d be surprised, my love. Remember the lemon verbena anal bleach?” Brian questioned, waggling thick eyebrows towards him suggestively, “Once you get used to the taste it’s not so bad.”

“I’ll keep that noted.” 

“Geez… Who needs foreplay when we can sit here and talk about Murray’s asshole?”

“You’re the one who’s tasted it, jerk…” he trailed off with fake annoyance before attending to the newcomer by tugging gently at a pair of khakis once a black shirt had been peeled off, rubbing at stained fabric between his spread knees, “So wet for us, huh?”

“Have been since I got a nice view earlier.” 

“How about having the real thing?” 

“Oh, yes please… Need to get this show on the road before I deflate…”

“Not gonna let that happen,” Murr warned as he continued to rub at the dark puddle that seeped through plaid boxer shorts, smirking triumphantly at how easily it was to get a gentle gasp as pressure was applied, “I’ll let Bri handle the rest. Need you to get on all fours, alright hon?”

Doing as told, a low moan was let out once knees dug into the padding, underwear pulled down to bent ankles in one swift motion before a ringed hand smacked firmly against the thick thigh a few times to watch the erect member twitch in the air. Lid uncapping with a faint echo, a healthy amount of liquid pooling in a cupped palm before friction heated the gel while the man beneath him busied with lapping up drops of offered precum, “I thought this was your first time?” 

“I’ve given my fair share of blowjobs.” 

“Ooh… I better get to feel that tongue around me next time.”

“Deal,” Salvatore remarked after pecking the slit of a mushroomed head, casting a green gaze over a hunched shoulder, “What’re you waiting for, an invite?”

“So sassy…” he sighed, tongue clucking against the roof of his mouth before it licked a stripe to tease a tightened hole open once the sticky substance had been rubbed in with care, hand shifting to a neglected shaft as his own sank in after a few slow hip rolls, “Better?”

Lips wrapped around a thinner length, Sal nodded in answer with caused his head to bob up and down as olive cheeks hollowed out without a second thought. Falling into rhythm with the shallow thrusts, eyelashes fluttered closed to help concentration center on the one he was pleasuring even through a few falters when a fist squeezed around his chubby cock. 

“Oh, babe…” Murr moaned out, nails combing through short-kept hair when he reached the back of a skilled throat, a swollen sack settling against the other’s chin, “How does he feel for you, baby?”

“Fits like a glove…”

“Oh? Couldn’t tell by how desperately you started fucking…” 

Dark brown eyes rolled along with an airy scoff, the oldest male continued to sink deeper into unexplored depths just as a crackle of electric heat began to vibrate inside, trying his best to ignore a building shockwave as speed picked up inside the constricting walls, “Gonna make you so full, Sally…”

“Not before I do!” 

Chuckling good-naturedly, Brian was the first that submitted to primal urges when long curls brushed against broad shoulder blades as his neck bent backward; long strands of white released without warning as extra shoves pressed into a sensitive spot. Not long after, spurts of release shot everywhere as hips desperately bucked into the hand holding him hostage, pants of hot air pushing the last of their threesome over the edge to spill in a straight shot down when the seed was swallowed hungrily. 

“That mouth of yours can do wonders, damn.”

“Don’t rub it in…” 

“It’s only fair after I let you stroke him off!”

Muffled laughter vibrated against the half-flaccid penis still in his mouth, it was reluctantly released along with a connecting trail of saliva that connected them until a thumb swiped through the fluid. Voice raspy after the barrage of blows against his windpipe no words were exchanged except for a single disappointed _Damn…_ when a light flood flowed out with the thickened piece of flesh, feeling alone for only an instant before two pairs of arms wrapped around slumped shoulders, sandwiched safely between the two men he trusted the most underneath the cyan bedspread in an odd sense of déjà vu. 

“Well, Sally, how was the experience?”

“Better than I imagined…”

“Oh? Admitting that you’ve jacked off to us, are we?”

“Bri…” Murr warned lightly, laying a flat palm against the heaving chest as curls of chest hair twirled around nimble fingers, salivated slits fitting together in a tired attempt at tasting each other’s tongues.

“Can I get some of that action?”

“Who would we be to deny you, Q-tie?”


End file.
